Dear People Magazine,
Every November, you come out with your "Sexiest Man Alive" issue; every spring, you print your list of the "World's Most Beautiful People."
But in 2007 -- for the last two hundred years -- the sexiest man and the most beautiful person has been ... a vampire.
George? Pffft. Brad? Come on! Jude? ...no.
Why isn't it that Colin Ames-Beaumont hasn't graced your cover? Is it simply because his picture cannot be taken? (He's so beautiful a blank cover with just his name on it would make your readers drool.) Because he usually only comes out at night? (How is that different than Johnny Depp?) Because you think he hasn't bared his assets for a Hollywood camera?
Are you afraid of his tainted blood? You shouldn't be: one look will not send you to the Chaos realm, surrounded by flying dragons and the screams of the damned. Only Colin sees that realm when he looks into a mirror -- it will not trouble you. Is it the woman he's falling in love with? Geeks need love, too, People Magazine -- a fact you have long overlooked (but that is another campaign to be won.)
Is it the fear that if you met him in a dark alley, the words "Oh my God you're so beautiful!" would hardly be past your lips before he had you up against the wall for some hot sexing that you wouldn't remember the next day?
No; none of those things are true impediments to being called "the sexiest" or "the most beautiful". I think the problem is that you've been stuck on one pesky little word in the "Sexiest Man" title: Alive.
But there are those of us -- readers and authors, geeks and norms -- who know that Undead can be just as sexy as Living. And we've got hundreds of paranormal romances to prove it.
So I'm beginning my campaign to get a vampire on the cover of your magazine. To no longer be forced to stare longingly at men who can't read my mind. Men who can't use a sword. Men who can't wear satin-lined capes and look good doing it. I'm calling for all readers, living and undead, to fight for vampire equality.
And I'm nominating Colin Ames-Beaumont to the be first representative of the "Sexiest Man Alive (and Undead)" for 2007. What separates him from other vampire romance heroes, you wonder? He's strong, as they are. He sucks blood, as they do. He's got out-of-control sexual appeal, as they do. But there is one thing, People Magazine, that makes Colin stand out from the rest of the vampire heroes.
Colin ... is blond.
But do not take my word for it; judge for yourself. And because he is cursed, unable to see his reflection or to have any pictures taken, the only proof I can offer is in Demon Moon. The book cover cannot do him justice -- you must look inside. Want a peek? The first four chapters are here. Or you can buy it at Amazon (it is available June 5 in stores everywhere).
Sincerely,
Meljean Brook
Living and Undead Readers for Vampire Equality
Join the L.U.R.V.E. Train - Because vampires are beautiful people, too.
(Want to join the L.U.R.V.E. Train? Nominate your own vampire, win books and Amazon gift certificates? Climb aboard here.)
No comments:
Post a Comment